Happy St. Patty’s Day

OMG!

I can’t believe there’s two feet of snow on the ground and Spring is right around the corner.
I only have a moment to write a few thoughts.

Of course, I’m thinking about my release day for Dangerous Code. Early reviewers are liking it a lot.

And I’m trying to remember my only Irish ancestor.

Unlike those that came in the 1800’s mine was here almost a century earlier. He lived in Vermont, a wealthy landowner.

She was very young French girl, an indentured servant who had come to the new world with nothing but hope. There is no record of the French girl after she leaves Vermont. I suspect she changed her name and started over. A young unmarried woman in the colonies would be unwelcome in all but a brothel.

I feel for her, poor dear.

Her Vermont family must have loved her very much because when she ran off, they treated the resulting babe, my great, great, great, as their own.

Would the Irishman have provided for the child? No one knows because he was found face down in flooded waters the very next spring.

If the bastard raped the young woman, good on him for ending up dead.

I would rewrite history. Our heroine finds another Irishman, a kind man with a gentle smile, who has need of someone to take care of his two children…

Of course they fall in love and have the mandatory HEA.

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Where did Stella find her heroine?

 

I am Gemini.  A twin. Two people in one. A strange and odd mix.

At work, I am an extrovert; a cog in a huge cube farm where my job is to make order out of chaos. I am an interface between developers and conglomerates. If I don’t get a project into the hands of a client in the time promised by sales, my company could lose millions.

However, I am happiest curled up with a book under a thick down comforter or in front of the fire. I think I started to write because I couldn’t find enough novels that I wanted to read.

I like an occasional domineering male with a wimpy virgin, but not always. I like a regency romance with a dashingly dark duke and debutante but it’s like always eating maple walnut ice cream. Which, by the way, is yummy.

Sometimes, I want another flavor.

I have to admit, I love when a gorgeous genius with a clever mind attracts the hero.

A man who’s not intimidated by a keen mind with a bold spirit is the alpha I need.  I met him in my latest book, Dangerous Code.

Detective Colin O’Brien is street smart and able to detect a lie a mile away.

Our heroine, however, can’t read people worth a damn.

Its a fun match.

I spoke with a fan on Facebook yesterday who read the Beta copy and she loved the interaction between the two. She says her daughter is similar to the heroine. If you ask for an opinion, brace for impact. She also said it was awesome to speak to a writer who understands that personality type and how good my book made her feel.

Doing the happy dance.

She asked me where I got my idea. Usually the stuff in my head is pure imagination but I thought real hard. I got 99% on my SAT scores, I am overly-opinionated, and blind to many facial expressions.

In this case, maybe I do have a clue.

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On pre-order now:

DANGEROUSCODEa

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Marketing, My Fear of Failure

 

After the unremarkable sales of my last book, I dead-stopped marketing. The thought of updating my blog made me freeze, I couldn’t find anything worthwhile to post on Facebook and my newsletter went silent.

What the hell was wrong with me?

At first I was convinced that I wanted to focus on my writing, then I was tired, then my day-job was overwhelming. Yada, yada, yada.

While all these things are true, they’re not the root cause of why I stopped. I think I have atychiphobia, fear of failure, in particular fear of failing at selling my books.

Yikes.

I looked it up on line and have all the symptoms. For me, it boils down to this.  What if I put myself out there and people don’t like me?

ARGH!

My persona is that of a successful, positive, outgoing woman. However, my abused inner child sabotages me. I know this and yet when it happens, I’m blind-sided. Growing up, I never experienced unconditional love.

Dammit. That isn’t me. Not now.

I need to ask her to step back and let me try my hand at marketing again. Sure, I may fail but eventually, with enough practice, I’ll get better. While I’m learning, it doesn’t change who I am or my value as a writer or as a human being.

Starting at lunch time, here is what I am going to do:

Write this blog. Woo hoo. Mark this one done!

Write a marketing plan, complete with due dates.

Schedule no-excuse marking time into every week.

Break the to-do list down into small tasks

Create a new mantra! Repeat after me, “I am successful at marketing.”

Face your fear head on. 

Picture yourself as a marketing maven.  What does it feel like? Live there in your imagination. Write about her.

Define Milestones and rewards.  Maybe that trip to a warm island surrounded by sand?

 

I must thank this website for helping me to define my problem.

http://www.businessknowhow.com/marketing/marketingfear.htm

 

More to come… please leave a comment with your own struggles!

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The Sign

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The hail stung my face and my feet burned, wet and cold in my second-hand boots. The last storm of the season was brutal. In a way, I was glad for the ice, because it disguised the tears streaming down my face.

This was my first day back to work in the city. I’d secretly hoped to stay home with my first born, at least for a few more months, but it was not to be.

You see, my husband quit his job in order to have more time to devote to being a recording engineer. “This is my last chance to make it, honey. For you. For the baby.”

Who could argue with that?

Our brand new car was gone. Stolen. Probably by the guys who installed the alarm. Brought up in Vermont, I was pretty naïve, even at thirty.

My parents refused to help, not even twenty bucks for some groceries and a bag of diapers.

God? I just don’t think I can believe in you anymore.

My normal subway stop was blocked because of the weather, so I had about a mile to walk. The despair of leaving my baby, of wanting more from my spouse, of just wanting, was so great I don’t know how I took another step.

I would’ve ended it all if it weren’t for my little Emily.

There was no God. There was no greater plan for me. There was just nothing.

Then I saw it! It was sitting on top of an icy garbage bucket in front of a brownstone. A plastic Santa from the 50’s. The white electric cord is wrapped around the base.

Santy?

My mother put out two when I was growing up. My older sister was given one, my brother, being number two in birth order, was given the other.

I loved those damn things.

Wow. Suddenly it dawned on me that I’d been given something that very few experience.

A sign. God was watching. He heard me that day.

And with faith and hope, all things are possible.

Many years have gone by since then. I have a great job, am still happily married to my dreamer, and my two girls are off on their own, successful entrepreneurs.

And I still believe.

Merry Christmas.

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Stella’s Sexy, Savvy, Strong Heroines

…and the alphas strong enough to love them.

I can’t wait to see what adventures Stella writes next! …Lauren, Romance Novel Giveaways

Ms. Alden is now on my ‘go to’ author list. I can’t wait for the next story.  …Emma, Night Owl Romance

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Some people have asked me recently, why do you write?

Others ask, are you making a lot of money?

LOL!

Not yet.

So why DO I write?

One of my goals is to give back, but I am a little geeky, a little shy, and don’t have buckets of money to give away.

How can I throw good karma into the world?

I do it with my stories.

When I started writing, I vowed I would write about strong heroines facing adversity and overcoming. Why? Because I truly believe that we become what we think about all day long.

If we dream about having someone dominate us, that is no doubt what we will attract. I’m not saying don’t ever read those fun books, I’m suggesting to balance your reading.

Read and imagine yourself as more.

 

Thanks so much for stopping by.

I do hope you will become a fan and sign up for my bi-monthly newsletter. I hate spam, too.

You can also read samples here or go right to Amazon and pick one up for this weekend.

Or… just log in and leave a comment below! I love to respond!

 

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