After the unremarkable sales of my last book, I dead-stopped marketing. The thought of updating my blog made me freeze, I couldn’t find anything worthwhile to post on Facebook and my newsletter went silent.
What the hell was wrong with me?
At first I was convinced that I wanted to focus on my writing, then I was tired, then my day-job was overwhelming. Yada, yada, yada.
While all these things are true, they’re not the root cause of why I stopped. I think I have atychiphobia, fear of failure, in particular fear of failing at selling my books.
I looked it up on line and have all the symptoms. For me, it boils down to this. What if I put myself out there and people don’t like me?
My persona is that of a successful, positive, outgoing woman. However, my abused inner child sabotages me. I know this and yet when it happens, I’m blind-sided. Growing up, I never experienced unconditional love.
Dammit. That isn’t me. Not now.
I need to ask her to step back and let me try my hand at marketing again. Sure, I may fail but eventually, with enough practice, I’ll get better. While I’m learning, it doesn’t change who I am or my value as a writer or as a human being.
Starting at lunch time, here is what I am going to do:
Write this blog. Woo hoo. Mark this one done!
Write a marketing plan, complete with due dates.
Schedule no-excuse marking time into every week.
Break the to-do list down into small tasks
Create a new mantra! Repeat after me, “I am successful at marketing.”
Face your fear head on.
Picture yourself as a marketing maven. What does it feel like? Live there in your imagination. Write about her.
Define Milestones and rewards. Maybe that trip to a warm island surrounded by sand?
I must thank this website for helping me to define my problem.
More to come… please leave a comment with your own struggles!
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